While my semester may not be entirely over quite yet (finals are still ahead), it’s safe to say that this semester has taken me for quite the ride. Instead of recapping only April, I decided to switch things up and recap this entire semester and my blogging journey so far. I’d like to preface this post by saying that, in contrast to monthly recaps, this post is going to be much more freely written and chatty, which I hope is a style you enjoy reading. Without further ado, here we go!
I’m not going to lie. It’s very hard for me to write this post. Not hard in the sense that terrible things have happened, which I am grateful for, but hard in the sense that blogging hasn’t seemed fun lately. I had a great blogging month in March and saw great improvement and growth in my numbers – but that’s all it was. I was producing content in order to make sure my numbers continued to grow in the hope that I could laid some paid sponsored content. Don’t get me wrong, that’s great, but it wasn’t fun anymore.
This entire year, I vowed to make blogging work for me in terms of content, viewership and making money. In retrospect, I never told myself to make sure that I was having fun while doing any of that. That’s why I “burned out.”
Before you start blogging, everyone tells you to find your niche, create and maintain every social media platform, blog consistently, reach out to brands in the hope for sponsorship opportunities – just to name a FEW of the things “necessary to have a successful blog.” That last phrase is what has always bothered me the most – not just in blogging but in every endeavor I’ve ever taken on. What gives someone else the power to define what makes ME successful?
To be frank, I feel like the only one who is bothered by this. For how carefully crafted each blog post, graphic, social media content, etc is by every individual, how dare we try and fit each other into a predefined box? That’s not to say that those who try to help others grow are bad people and should stop blogging. I mean, that’s what I set out to do – help others, but in a different way. There are bloggers who I regularly read who do a great job coaching other bloggers and businesses to grow by doing ____. They are happy with what they’re doing and love doing it and are supported by those around them. They are “doing them” and reaping the benefits of doing so – go them!
I admire their success. With everything else they seem to have going on in their lives, their support system and passion for what they’re writing about keeps propelling their blogs forward. That’s what I’m trying to do – find both my passion and support system. I’ve mentioned this in a few monthly recap posts – I’m less than thrilled learning about advertising. I feel lucky that the advertising class I took this semester was super interesting and felt relevant to something you might do in real life. Going through my routine and talking to other people who are really excited about what their learning and have their path figured out has been incredibly discouraging to say the least. My entire life I’ve always been the optimistic person in the bunch and coming to college has made it very hard to remain that way. Real life with its real responsibilities is no longer in the distant future – it’s knocking on my front door and I don’t want to answer. At all.
All of this in combination with an unsure support system has created a very uncertain me. Uncertain in the sense that I question every single thing that I do before, during and after I do it. It feels like no one cares what I have to say, what I’m doing or where I’m going unless it is either exactly what they want me to do or the exact opposite. How does that leave me feeling? Exhausted, restless and constantly on the verge of tears.
Well I’ve had it.
Yes, I am tired. Tired of feeling this way. I’m 21 years old and have my whole life ahead of me which is way too expansive of a time period to allow myself to continue to feel this way.
Yes, I will continue blogging. You will notice a larger variety of posts, perhaps a new design or layout. I realized while reading others’ blog posts and watching YouTube videos, that the topics I most enjoyed reading/watching were topics that I don’t talk about. Why? No good reason. Well, that’s about to change and man, am I excited about it!
After all of that, what does this mean for you? I’m going to work on getting up two blog posts a week. I’ll still be active on my social media (Check ’em out: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, Google +). I’m optimistic that this change in my mentality will help me better express myself through my blog, in real life and lead to more positive changes in my life.
Thanks for bearing with me thus far and if you find yourself in a similar situation as I or just need someone to hear you out, shoot me an email: firstname.lastname@example.org .
Here’s to a bright and adventurous May!